I had to go on a little business trip this weekend to Dallas. I didn't see JR, and Lucy didn't come to lunch. Sorry Karen and Travis. My sister and her husband got a little too hooked on Dallas reruns when they were dating and first married. The night they were watching and my sister exclaimed in a shocked tone, "Well, what's Lucy doing at lunch?", the hubby and I started having concern that they actually thought they were Ewings. It was when they started humming the show's theme song when they pulled into their driveway that we really got concerned. OK, that part was maybe an exaggeration.
I used to get a little uptight when I had to travel, but I guess as my kids have gotten older, I've gotten over that some. Once I got on a plane, I was fine. It was just the thought of leaving and some "what ifs". It's weird, but I think my sister-in-law dying has had something to do with my change of attitude as well. One of the worst possible things I can imagine actually happened to my family. Somehow it takes some of the pressure off of the "what ifs" because one of the "what ifs" happened. I'm sure that sounds completely insane to normal people, but if you've read this blog more than three minutes, you know by now that I may not fall into that "normal people" category.
I had some revelations on this trip. First of all, and there is a chance that this one may make me a bit of a bad mother, but lying in a hotel bed watching any stupid show on TV that I want with no laundry to go throw in the dryer during commercials or dishwashers to load isn't such a bad gig on occasion. I love my family dearly, but I figure they can survive fine without me for a couple of nights.
And about those TV shows. I have also found that cable TV has a reality show/documentary type show for about any topic you could imagine. I just have basic cable at home so staying in a hotel lets me find out what all I'm missing out on with Extended cable. I started watching Discovery Health when I got in from dinner one night and decided I might be a doula- you know, be the cheering section for women giving birth. Then I watched a little longer and decided I might be a doula in prison (not me actually be a doula prisoner- just a doula that visits the prisoners)- there's even shows about that. I contacted my friend SUMMER (she wants a mention in this blog apparently) to see if she'd go ahead and have another baby so I could try out this doula thing before I move on to the prison system. Since I have lots of stipulations on what I find creepy during childbirth, ie any position besides lying on one's back, the birthing mommy not maintaining a certain dress code during the birth, any birthing in water ( I can barely pull the plug out of my kitchen sink without gagging at the weird floating things in the water, I can only imagine having a baby in water- um, yuck), and since Summer thinks ropes are somehow involved in the birthing process, I've about decided I might give up my doula-ing plans. Also there's the part where I've had two C-sections and really don't know what all goes on with that whole birthing thing might also set me back. I know she'll be disappointed, but maybe Summer will still be my friend. I did mention her in this blog after all.
On TV, I also found out that Guy what's-his-name eats a lot of ribs/BBQ on that Drive-In/Dives show, and they're always the best he's ever had. Just once, I'd love for the local chef people to go through showing him all their big secrets, fix him up a big plate of their specialty, the camera zoom in on him taking one of his huge bites and for him to yell, "Oh my gosh, this is horrible! I wouldn't feed this junk to my dog!" Admit it. It would tickle you too. Or send him to Ridgewood Barbecue where they wouldn't care who he was, he'd wait outside with everybody else, and they'd be doing him the favor if they did let him in to eat their food.
When traveling, I also find I'm not near businessy enough, but lucky for me, I have a travel buddy with me sometimes, and she's not either. It's my friend Jen-nae, and we're just like peas and carrots. Now we do a good job for our company, we just can't help it if we happen to have lots of fun doing it. We can't help it if our offices sometimes have lots of pictures of squirrels in them. Or if they have "Most Wanted" posters around with Jen-nae's face on them. We can't help it if we might roll Oregano joints. We can't help it if we research things like what the sign means in front of the dirty store (it only took one phone call to the Intimate Treasures worker, and she told just what we needed to know....and maybe a little more.) We can't help it, and we just keep hoping our boss understands that. It's just a problem we have.
We've also gone on several "business" trips together that go about like our office time. We got stuck at a mall in Dallas and the hotel driver refused to come get us during a snowstorm one time. Did you know it never snows in Dallas...until we get there? We've gone to eat in Nashville while on one of our trips to find ourselves at a restaurant with the biggest bunch of crazies dancing that we've ever seen. I'm pretty sure one guy was Rumpelstiltskin, and he kept trying to get my pal to dance with him and his cane. I did get video of him with my phone until he started toward me, and I got scared he was going to beat me with that cane. We quickly retreated to the bathroom where Bon Qui Qui and her sidekick were the bathroom hostesses. We don't actually think anyone asked them to be, they just decided to set up their Tussy deodorant, 30 year old, crusty bottles of half used Avon lotion and AquaNet to try and make a buck or two on tips. We certainly didn't partake in any of their toiletries/ beauty aids but were scared, so we tipped them anyway- "Here ya go, Mam. We don't care for any of your moldy roll-on, but we would like to leave with our lives. Thanks so much and have a great night." So after relaying just a very, very few, tip of the iceberg stories of our business, I guess I'll just leave the guys on the airplane alone, but if you ask me, they need to buy an exercise ball and lighten up a little.
So, I'm glad to be home. Extended Cable would be fun, but all those career changes I would have would just be exhausting, and some of those prisoners are down right scary. I like traveling, but I like coming home. I know I could have chosen a few things differently and really climbed career ladders that would have made me much more businessy like those other folks on the plane, but I like being home to raise my kids and frankly, I like working hard at my job but having some fun while I do it. My sidekick/partner in crime has a birthday this week. I'm lucky to call her coworker and very blessed to call her friend. Happy Birthday, Jenay-nay. We're like peas and carrots. But now it's time to head, I've got clothes to put in the dryer.
I will give one more shout out to my namesake nephew who turns 13 today. He's a great kid, and I love him much. I'm glad we share a name whether he is or not.
No comments:
Post a Comment